Open letter to self

You foolish girl, why did you go and write a post painting yourself as the poster child for wellbutrin or zoloft or xanax or cyanide or whateverthefuck you're eating these days a mere FORTY EIGHT HOURS after you'd started it? Did it ever occur to you that perhaps, just perhaps, it would be a bit more prudent to wait a week or so, maybe even two, to see how this shit was actually going to work? Of course it didn't. Because you are a silly little girl.

Guess what, Self? You're not better. You're still tired. You're still pretty angry, and pretty hopeless. If you had a brain in your stupid little head, you'd realize that the whole "so much energy! feel so good! so happy!" thing wasn't the medicine kicking in...in your world, this is what they call "rapid cycle mania." Duh. Dumb shit.

Stop being stupid, Self. Stop being an asshole to people you love. Stop scaring your friends. Buck the fuck up, and deal with it, cuz no one's got time for your melodrama right now. You've got more important shit to deal with, so grin and bare it and be happy that you have people who love you to be an asshole TO. Or...something. Without the asshole part. Whatever.

Love,

The Part of Your Brain That Hasn't Been Eaten Yet

AHEM. Thank for your patience. Moving on to things that aren't eating my brain, but no less sickening, can we discuss the search strings that bring people here? Let's review:

"little girl fucking with boyfriend"

"dad fucking little girl"

"pictures of little girls sucking"

And there was one so disgustingly twisted that I dare not write it here for fear that similar strings will lead even more sickos here.

I'm...sensing a theme here, people. And, um, suffice it to say that it's one that I never really intended. There are a lot of themes in this blog - "Stupid and Pointless," "Selfish and Narcissistic," & "Whiny and Melodramatic" are a few that come to mind - but the whole kiddie porn angle was never one I actively strove toward.

P.S. UPDATED TO SAY: DUDE! While I was writing this, someone got here with "little girl fucking"

P.P.S. KNOCK IT OFF

P.P.P.S. Perhaps I'd see less of this if I stopped repeating the search strings. Quick! Another search string! PICTURES OF KITTENS FLUFFY KITTENS SILLY PUPPIES CUTE KITTIES KITTENS ARE SO NICE FLUFFY SNUGGLE BUNNY PUPPY POOP.

-----random and pointless topic change with no transitional elements whatsoever-----

There is a dive bar down the street from my house that I've always been slightly afraid of. For one thing, the parking lot has a really fucked up configuration. It looks difficult, and me and difficult parking lots usually don't work out. For another, it's situated on some railroad tracks. And there's a carved native American head on the door. Aren't bars with native americans on railroad tracks where washed up cowboys and motorcycle gang members hang out? I'm not sure where I learned this, but I'm going to assume that it is perfectly and completely true, and not something I made up in my head just now.

Anyway, Lauren and I are going to enter this bar tonight. I chose it because it's close, and I doubt there'll be any over abundance of slutty girls and greased up frat boys in there, and you can get an acceptable vodka redbull at any bar, no matter how many gang members are in there, and that is basically all I require. Lauren is dragging me out to talk about my feelings. She wants me to let it all out. I, for my part, am just going for the free booze. I can't have any hooch in my house anymore, so I figure it's ok to occassionally take advantage of my best friend for a little alcoholic relief. Such is the life of a true rockstar, folks, you are in the presence of greatness.

Comments

[Sparkling Red]

So how was the dive bar?