A B-L-O-G? Buh-log? Wha? Huh.
SO HI. HOW ARE YOU. I WAS NOT MISSING FOR OVER A MONTH, I SWEAR. NOR DID I COME BACK WITH A VICIOUS AND UNDETERRED PREFERENCE FOR CAPSLOCK.
So, dudes. I'm sorry. Seriously, I am. I know you hear this all the time, but I SWEAR TO GOD I intended to update. I PROMISED myself I'd update. I made bold, out-loud statements about updating! And then..you know. Life happened, and some other shit happened. And some other shit that I wish had nothing to do with life happened. So, yeah. Sorry about that.
In numbered, vaguely (or totally) incoherent form, I give you:
WHY WRITING A BLOG FELL REALLY REALLY LOW ON MY LIST OF PRIORITIES.
1. That move I spoke of occurred.
2. The aforementioned move occurred the day after the winter's worst snow storm, in 12 degree weather.
3. The move was into a place that we learned, that day, had no gas line.
4. In case you are slow, I will connect these dots for you. No gas line + 12 degree weather = NO HEAT IN 12 DEGREE WEATHER.
5. HEY GUESS WHAT THERE'S NO HEAT AND IT'S REALLY FUCKING COLD.
6. I had to live at my in-laws with my husband and kids for about a week.
7. I ACTUALLY moved into this house.
8. HEY GUESS WHAT THE SHOWER DOESN'T WORK I WONDER WHY THAT IS.
9. HEY GUESS WHAT THE STOVE DOESN'T WORK EITHER, HAHAH DON'T YOU LOVE THE SMELL OF GAS LEAKING THROUGH YOUR HOUSE?
10. Max got fat.
11. Donovan stayed skinny.
12. The stove did not work until it was replaced in APRIL. APRIL PEOPLE, THAT IS A MONTH WITHOUT A STOVE.
13. There were lots of job interviews.
14. There was a lot of arguing and yelling with the school district to get Donovan in school.
15. Nik's grandfather died.
16. I stopped speaking with my mother. Finally, for fuck's sake.
17. Donovan FINALLY started school.
18. I started working ludicrous hours that kept me out of the house for 12 hours a day. Not the hours where I wasn't missing anything, either.
19. I stopped working that job.
20. Max fell off the couch.
21. Parenting = FAIL.
22. After three months, we finally kicked the thrush.
23. Donovan got Strep and the fever spiked so high we had to go to the emergency room. Three different people, including one who WORKS AT THE HOSPITAL, gave me bad directions, and it took an hour and a half to get to a hospital that's probably about six miles away, all the while my son was becoming more and more lethargic and unresponsive in the backseat.
24. That brings us to today.
It was a month, dude. IT WAS A MONTH. Not one I care to repeat. I cannot honestly say that I'm settled and happy here quite yet. Turns out, yeah dude, I was totally right. This shit was a MISTAKE. But we're here now, so we're making the best of it.
I am desperately trying to catch up with my reader, and my commenting and...you know. All that. Is anyone still out there?
